France (Bretagne) : Warm buttocks
Posted by     déc. 10, 2018     Home , Myths and legends of Europe , Les contes et légendes de Lunesia    0 Comments
France (Bretagne) : Warm buttocks

Christmas is fast approaching. To celebrate this moment of joy and sharing to come, I wanted you to discover a story.

Be careful, this is not just any tale: it is something new, written by a young author whom I am delighted to present here: Séverine Rosaire.

Discover now, without waiting for the story she wrote to help us wait for Christmas: Warm buttocks!

The tale :

- What's wrong with you? You're all red!
- It's okay, it's just that my ass is hot.
- Oh well yes, you bet I've been cooking too since just now....
- Sometimes I get tired of it.... We are constantly being mistreated, it seems that we do not count, that we are no better than an old sock.
- Stop it! Stop it! You shouldn't say that, they love us!
- Oh, yeah? And if not, how's your nose, Rudolf?
He's taking a blush. It's a low blow, Chouquette knows it.
- They'll sew it back on, I'm sure," Rudolf mumbles.
That's clever! Now that Chouquette has pointed it out to him, that's all he can see. His little nose without a pompom in the middle of his face. Ironic for a reindeer.... Especially for a red-nosed reindeer.
But he can see it from here. It has been on the kitchen table for three days. Tonight when they come home, they'll sew it back on, I'm sure, he's trying to reassure himself.
- No, but look what happened to you! That's not love, that's not love!
- It was an accident, they had nothing to do with it...
- The fact that the dog catches you, still passes, even if I think they could have avoided it if you counted a minimum in their eyes, but now Ruru, you stayed two days and two nights to serve as a snack in Taïss, it's horrible!!
Rudolf knows that well. He really thought it was the end of him. 48 hours of nightmare. Until Mila found out she was missing. My dear little Mila! She loves me, she loves me!
But Rudolf tries as much as possible to forget this traumatic episode. Well obviously, it would help if he didn't miss his nose in the middle of his face....
- Damn, my ass is hot!
- Yes, it's fine, it's fine, I remind you that we're both in the same boat," replied Rudolf, feeling the scorching burn that goes up his butt too.
He's getting tired of whining about Shouquette. What he needs is to be positive, a little magic, after all, it's Christmas, right?
- I'm telling you, you're just here to look pretty. In a few days, you'll go back to rot at the bottom of your box until next year, and no one will miss you!
- Oh, that's all right, stop it, Rudolf says, exasperated, at least I haven't been called "Chouquette"! What kind of name is that? Nothing more to do with Christmas," he said with contempt.
As soon as he uttered this sentence, he immediately regretted his words. In the same boat, he repeats himself, we are in the same boat...
- Excuse me, Sweetie. I didn't mean it.
Chouquette doesn't say anything anymore. She watches the flashing lights of the tree in silence.
- Don't sulk! Don't sulk! You know me.....
- Yes, that's just it!
- We're both here, we don't need anything else!
-Shhh!!!!! They're coming in!
Rudolf and Chouquette stop. Mila and Oscar rush into the house, overexcited. Looks like they brought something back.
Mommy goes to get her toolbox and heads for the fireplace.
Still mute, Rudolf and Chouquette look at each other, anxious.
Mom put a nail in. Dad looks at her with a big smile as he rocks baby Hugo in his arms.
Oscar finally takes something proud out of his bag.
No...
They didn't dare...
Rudolf looks at Chouquette in panic. She understood too.
A few hours later, the fire is still crackling in the chimney. Three Christmas socks form a V just above the fireplace.
- Hi, guys! Hi!
No one answers.
- Are you all right? You're making a face! I'm Snowflake. Say, it's hot in here.
- Listen, kid," said Rudolf, taking the accent of the godfather. Here, you're going to have to understand. Me and Chouquette have been here a long time. If you want to make your place here, you'll have to keep a low profile....
- Oh, it's okay, it's okay, Grandpa! What are you, anyway? A sock? A crippled Reindeer or what?
Rudolf already wants to throw the new kid in Taïss' face. Chouquette, on the other hand, took on the melancholic look of a suicidal sock.
A little newcomer who thinks he's a prince, that's all he needs...
- You see Rudolf, I told you so. This is the beginning of the end.... They're going to put us in the attic. Soon this house will belong to a bunch of cheap socks made in China!
- Hey, ho ho! I can hear you, I can hear you, shout Snowflake.
- Do you mind? The gentleman and the lady haven't finished their conversation!
"You'll also have to teach him politeness, here, rumine Chouquette.
- Say, guys, don't you have a little warmth in your butt?
- Yes, yes, that's right.... Always talk...
Rudolf no longer recognizes himself. He, usually soft as a reindeer, seems to be kneaded with anguish and bitterness.
All this must be because of that nose thing, he thinks.
- No, but I'm not kidding! I'm really really hot in my butt, it's not normal!
- Yes, it's fine, it's fine, we know, you'll get used to it: it's called a fireplace. And you're going to spend a good part of your life there, believe it or not!
- AGREED," suddenly shouted Snowflake, "BUT THAT IS NORMAL, too? BECAUSE RIGHT NOW I'M REALLY TOO HOT AT ASSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!
- Sweet?
- Mmmm?
- I think the new neighbor has a problem.
- Mmmm?
- Sweet, open your eyes, please.
The beautiful warm sock made of virgin alpaca wool finally deigns to look down on Snowflake.
- Ahhhhhh!!!!! But something must be done!!!!! SNOWFLAKE IS ON FIRE IN THE BUTT!
- Thank you, I had noticed, Rudolf and the poor Snowflake, in agony, shouted in their hearts...
- Taïss! Here!!!!!
-Taisss! Yes, yes..... That's my dog, good boy! Come and eat the sock...
The dog grabs Snowflake's foot in his wet mouth and slides it to the ground, before dragging it inexorably towards the devil's lair: his basket. The fire was narrowly avoided.
- Still, do you think he's gonna make it? Ask Shaggy with a vague sense of guilt. He wasn't that bad, the bastard.... Maybe we were a little hard on him, weren't we?
- But yes, it will be fine, Rudolf reassures her. He's a tough guy. And then, with his scars on his butt, he's part of the team now!

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